Unbelief Assessment

New Field New Field I find myself being disappointed, even offended that God doesn't seem to work as I believe He should or answer prayers the way that I thought He should. When I hear of others experiencing God's presence and power or how their prayers were answered, my first reaction is to analyze or even disclaim what they are saying. I try to pass off a critical spirit as being a berean spirit. The berean spirit is the discerning and protecting spirit. Typically pastors struggle with this. I'm critical of the direction and methods of church and ministry leaders. I tend to be suspicious. I wonder why the Holy Spirit doesn't seem to talk to me or use me as powerfully as someone else. I doubt that God really speaks to or use others as they claim because I don't see Him speaking to me or using me in that way. I tend to be self sufficient and independent from others. If I'm honest about it, I tend to be self sufficient and independent from God. I first perceive people and situations as impossible, rather than looking at them as possible with God. I'm not confident that I have spiritual authority through Jesus Christ. There's a lack of confidence that I can do all things through Christ who strengthens you. I'm not motivated to pray consistently, and I have very little interest in spiritual warfare prayer. Prayer is usually a last resort for me. I succumb to habitual behaviors and addictions [coping mechanisms] to comfort me when I feel discouraged, afraid or hopeless. I think my situations, my fears, my sins, my marriage, my spiritual life, my ______ will never change. I panic when I receive bad or distressing news, or even the suggestion that something is bad or distressing can occur. I just fall apart at bad news. I tend to be worried or anxious about many things. I fear that my children or family member will never be saved. I try to control people, situations and even God because I'm afraid to let go and trust Him to care for them, to save them, to protect, to lead them. I'm skeptical of the present-day supernatural work of the Holy Spirit. For example, praying in your heavenly prayer language daily or that the Holy Spirit still heals people or that miracles, signs and wonders still occur or that you have spiritual gifts specifically placed within you from God that you are to be developing and operating in weekly. I fear taking the risk of praying and ministering boldy with others in areas like healing or spiritual freedom. I fear stepping out in faith in response to confirmed revelation that God has given to me or to others in the body of Christ.